Britney Dearest: 15 Ways To Embrace Your Role as a Full-Time Stay-at-Home Mom

/ Wednesday, May 27, 2015

15 Ways To Embrace Your Role as a Full-Time Stay-at-Home Mom



Being a stay-at-home mom can be tough and very over whelming at times. You're around kids 24-7. They may whine a lot, siblings fight, you're on diaper duty 24-7, feedings, potty training, cleaning, cooking, shopping... The list of not-so-fun-stuff goes on! It can be difficult to find time for yourself and to get everything done that you have planned for the day. It gets stressful! 

I go through moments of stress every once in awhile because heck, don't we all need breaks from our duties and routines sometimes?! There are numerous situations that can cause a stay-at-home mom stress, and oftentimes, if things aren't going great in a certain area of our lives (ie marriage, weight, or finances) it can spill over into other areas and then we struggle to find joy and motivation to do basic things like maintaining the home or taking your children out for fun activities and play-dates.


It's important for all mothers to make sure we're not only healthy physically, but also emotionally healthy. If you have a good outlook and the proper resources, being a stay-at-home mom can be very stimulating and overall, very rewarding.

Here are some ideas and examples from my own personal experiences that you can apply to your daily life to help you enjoy the benefits of being a full-time stay-at-home mother:

Create a daily schedule. I'll be the first to admit, that after 4 years of being a stay-a-home mom, my schedule is still a little... inconsistent, however, I notice that when I stick to a cleaning schedule {off and on} it helps me to be more relaxed. A messy home makes me tense and unmotivated because I'm worrying about and focusing on the mess and when I should clean and how I procrastinated on cleaning yesterday and the day before and "oh my goodness, if someone comes over!". So yeah. Have a cleaning schedule lol. The better we keep our home maintained on a daily basis, the less things will accumulate which usually means less stress (says my husband). I'm "preaching" to myself as well. Pinterest can help you better than I can...





You should also create a {flexible} daily schedule, such as: 1. You wake up before the kids, make your bed and read or meditate every morning. 2. Get the kids up & dressed. 3. Watch tv then have learning and craft time for 30 minutes. 4. Play time then lunch & clean up time, etc. Every Tuesday and Thursday can be outing days.



Get some sleep lady! When you are well rested, you are less likely to be moody and grumpy and lash out at your kids at the drop of spilled milk. Sleep is great for your health. If at all possible, nap when your little ones nap.

Get dressed. When I get showered and dressed, make myself look decent, I'm more motivated to get things done. I'm in a better mood than if I'm sitting around all day in my pajamas. I don't get all casually dressed up or anything. I prefer cute & comfy lounge clothes for myself and my babies throughout the week. If my husband is working nearby (he's a window and door installer) and decides to call me and say, "hey, why don't you and Gabe come meet me for lunch", We're already prepared. I don't have to be self conscious about looking a hot mess or rush to get us ready.


Keep your kids busy with fun activities and learning. It's important to keep their growing brains stimulated. Some activities will involve you, some will not. When I'm working on a project, I usually find a safe and simple "project" for my son to work on at the same time. Or if I have to paint something I do it when my son wants to play outside and ride his bike. That way we're both outside together and I'm still able to watch him and encourage him when he does a "cool trick". We watch Leapfrog movies together on Netflix and focus on learning letters, sounds, and numbers, we play Yo Gabba Gabba! Bingo, color, and paint. There are far to many activities to be bored.



Indulge yourself in a hobby or a few {but don't forget about your family and home duties!}. I enjoy learning about interior decorating and DIY home projects via Pinterest. I love projects, photography, and graphic design. I love to read a good book, read blogs, blog, paint my nails, organize. Search Pinterest for new recipes to try. Workout. You could even turn your hobby into cash (have you seen Etsy?). I get paid to design event invitations and flyers :-) You can even take a few college classes. The possibilities are dang near endless!


Get out the house with your babies! Yes! I'm kickin' you out of your own house! Only for a few hours though :-) Get out for play dates with other mothers once or twice a week. Play dates are great for mommies and children because the adults talk and socialize while the kids play. My son loves Chik-Fil-A and there are usually a lot of other moms and kids there you and your little one can socialize with. I absolutely love taking my son out on mommy-son dates and taking him shopping with me while my two older kids are in school. He's such a good kid when it's just us two. We go to the zoo, amusement parks, educational centers. We enjoy trips to the library. The kids love finding multiple books to read and I love finding multiple books to help me learn more about my hobbies and self improvement. This is another area where the possibilities are dang near endless. Google activities in your area.

Respectfully demand your "me-time". When I'm nearing or at my stress-point {every once in awhile} I let my husband know exactly how I feel at the moment and exactly what I need from him, which is, watch the kids while I take a 30 minute reading break alone in my bedroom... Or while I go out and treat myself to a smoothie... Or while I soak in a hot bubble bath surrounded by candles while he puts the kids in bed. Whatever you need to do to relax, get 'er done :-)

Have some fun adult interaction {outside of the internet}. Well, the internet can be beneficial for meeting other great mothers like yourself:-). You can join some type of fitness class, take up a hobby, or go out with friends and family for a weekend girls night out. Personally, I'm very close to my family and friends. My kids spend a night or weekend with their aunts and grandparents once or twice a month so I take advantage of that time. My husband and me get out together at least once a month.

Don't compare yourself to other mother's. You will always be special to your children. Don't compare or get jealous of other mother's who appear to "have it all together". You never know what they went through in their parenting journey or are currently going through. Know that you are one of a kind and no one can be a better you, but you. You got this mom!



Take advantage of nap time. I may get on the computer, take a long shower, have some girl talk with my best friend, mother, or sisters, fold laundry while watching one of my favorite shows, read, pray, meditate, etc.

Take pride in the fact that your child desires your attention. Yeah, it gets annoying, especially when you're busy trying to do your own thing, but you can always come back to doing your own thing. Focus on that beautiful smile they flash you and the joy they have when you give them your undivided attention. That age doesn't last long.

Remember that they'll only be this young once and these precious moments we have with them now, the days, we can't get them back. Enjoy and embrace their childhood moments and make precious memories while you can.



Be patient with your child and with yourself. You will have good days and you will have not-so-good days. Keep in mind that you set the tone and energy. When you are over whelmed, slow down and take your time. Breathe mama! These moments are temporary, they won't last forever. Embrace. Change your outlook. Tantrums will happen. That's what infants and toddlers do. Handle with love, care, and a little discipline if necessary, not anger and frustration. Turn messy situations into laughing and playful moments. Your 9 month old got food everywhere, well, that's kinda their job and, they're super cute! Go get your camera, make your baby smile and take some adorable pictures! It'll be fun to look back on when they're adults. I know, easier said than done. But it can be done :-)

Know that you are the best person to take care of your childYou know your child better than anyone else. You know their likes and dislikes. They know that you will always have their best interest at heart. You will always want what's best for them and you will do your best to give it. It doesn't really matter to your child why you decided to stay home with them, what matters is that you are there.

Even when you don't feel like it, JUST DO IT. This one is much easier said than done. When I first started as a sahm, I was such a drab! I had -0- motivation to do anything fun. I literally forced myself to get up and do things with my kids and buy things for crafty projects. I started small because I didn't want to over whelm myself, but the more fun my kids and I had, the more motivated I became. Stay at home moms only stay at home sitting on their butts bored out of their minds because they chose to. I chose the drab life for over a year and it was such a waste of precious time!

If no one else will motivate us, we have to motivate ourselves!

A friend of mine and her husband had one working vehicle for awhile. She refused to stay stuck in the house all day while he was at work so a few days a week she would take him to work, kids in tow, at 5:30 a.m. so that she could keep the car and get out the house to keep her sanity. Did she want to wake up that early? Heck no, but she did what she had to do for herself and her children.

Same rule applies for chores and giving your kids the attention they crave- JUST DO IT.



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I have been a sahm since 2011. At this time in my life, I do not have any desire to work outside my home. I believe I am right where I should be- taking care of home and family full-time. I'm not that great at it, but I genuinely love it. The only thing that makes me a little envious of working moms is the extra money, however, I don't worry about it much because I know that my time will come. Work will always be there and so will further education. I'm in no rush to get back to work.



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I understand that the stresses of being a stay-at-home mom affect individuals differently. Not everyone can come out of stress on their own and too much stress can easily lead to depression. If you feel that you are experiencing signs of depression, you need professional help and there's nothing wrong with admitting that and seeking help.



Ladies, if you have any more suggestions or words of wisdom, please list them below! Let's help our sisters out.
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12 comments:

  1. I just love reading your blogs...even the ones that don't pertain to me at the time!! Keep up the good work!!

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  2. Great article. Really good advice. I'm sure this will be helpful to someone. Your inner beauty shines through your writing. I'm officially a fan.

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  3. This post was so on time! Thanks for sharing these tips, Britney!

    I felt like you were reading my mind when you started talking about the cleaning schedule. I'm always procrastinating on it, trying to get other things done in a timely matter. Then I get irritated when things begin to cause clutter and I'm in a panic like--- what if we have company?? Everyone's gonna think I'm a horrible mom and wife!

    I really need to take note of getting more rest, though. It seems like when I do, everything else magically falls into place. And there's no more cranky mommy lol.

    Great post, love! Hope your week is off to an awesome start!

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    1. Yes! I feel more energized when I'm well rested. Thank you for reading! It feels good to know that I'm not the only mom with issues! lol.

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  4. very overwhelmed..i just cant feel what ur saying, and i mean this respectfully and as a fellow sister in Christ. I cannot get breaks so easily as most moms, as my husband is barely home. Also my family and his family isnt available or interested in taking on my kids for a few hours. people say that theyre gonna help me at church etc. but they never mention it again.the one friend that used to help me around the house is pregnant and feel very sick a lot. i have an autistic child and people often get intimidated by that and though i just got a waiver to help watch him, my other kids need me too. ive maybe had 2 or 3 outings with other sisters in Christ in 3 years. alone time, maybe once or twice. im frazzled, and i need to regain my vision for being a sahm.When i started i was delighted as id always wanted to be a sahm. i love my kids but am just completly losing who i am. i need tips for regaining vision when getting a break isnt an option. also my son who again is severly autistic, cant interact quite as much with crafts and is constantly moving(and doesnt take naps). Please pray that all of this makes sense..im really not trying to be confrontationl, just need advice prayer or all of the above

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    Replies
    1. Brittany, I'm sorry to hear that. When your husband is home, is there a way that your husband can help you put the kids to bed a little early at night so you can relax? Maybe a family member can just come over with you and keep an eye on the kids while you take a nap or do something relaxing in the home or take a walk. My sister-in-law has done that for me. She has come over to he;p me clean and help with laundry in exchange for me baby-sitting for her. Feel free to email me, okay.

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    2. Dear Brittany, your situation must be very very very difficult. You must be so exhausted and you definitely need someone to help you. It is often so difficult to find such a person. I feel often overwhelmed with just one child and I get lots of help from my family. Can't imagine how difficult it must be to be in your shoes! An autistic child takes all of you, I had an autistic child in my class as I used to teach and it was difficult even with a teacher assistant. But this boy was so beautiful and just so precious to me! His mother was a sensible amazing woman. I really admired all she did for him. I love that boy! And I want to thank you for all the attention and care you give to your child, who needs you so so much. Autistic children can be very demanding but they are very beautiful and original souls.

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  5. I just stumbled onto your blog...love this article...great points that we as Moms need to remember!

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  6. I just stumbled onto your blog...love this article...great points that we as Moms need to remember!

    ReplyDelete

About Me

Hi! I'm Britney. I'm a wife and a mother to 3 children + 1 fur baby. I write about everything family, home, and DIY related. I'm slightly obsessed with home decor Instagram accounts and DIY blogs. Junk food is my peace. Read more

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